Cancer Will Regret The Day It Messed With Swayze

This is an excerpt from last night’s live installment of The Movie Blog: Uncut. Doug points out to us all that Cancer has picked a fight it can not win. (WARNING: Some of you may be surprised to find out that Doug uses profanities in this editorial rant).

Help spread the word of Swayze’s impending victory and post this video on your web site/facebook/myspace/blog by grabbing the YouTube version of this video here.


  • 1. Andrew replies at 6th March 2008, 4:59 am :

    Well said, Doug. Although I think that cancer will go down from Swayze’s AK-47 while he yells “WOLVERINES!” like the Soviets did. :)

  • 2. Kevin C replies at 6th March 2008, 7:25 am :


  • 3. movie replicas replies at 6th March 2008, 7:41 am :

    Doug, you need a tv show or a movie. get a friggi’ agent while you’re down there in LA. That was hilarious.

  • 4. JoJo replies at 6th March 2008, 7:46 am :

    I find this incredibly offensive and insensitive.

  • 5. jan replies at 6th March 2008, 8:13 am :

    As soon as i heard the new about Swayze the first thing that came in to mind was Doug ;)

  • 6. Chisox replies at 6th March 2008, 8:17 am :

    Pancreatic cancer is no laughing matter.

    from wiki:

    Patients diagnosed with pancreatic cancer typically have a poor prognosis partly because the cancer usually causes no symptoms early on, leading to metastatic disease at time of diagnosis. Median survival from diagnosis is around 3 to 6 months; 5-year survival is much less than 5%[14] With 37,170 new diagnoses in the United States every year, and 33,700 deaths, pancreatic cancer has the highest fatality rate of all cancers and is the fourth highest cancer killer in the United States among both men and women.[15]

    Pancreatic cancer occasionally may result in diabetes. Insulin production is hampered and it has been suggested that the cancer can also prompt the onset of diabetes and vice versa.

  • 7. nbakid2000 replies at 6th March 2008, 8:41 am :

    We’re not laughing at the fact that he has cancer. We’re laughing AT cancer.

    The best way to make it through these things is with humor.

  • 8. mrjuju replies at 6th March 2008, 8:59 am :

    How can saying someone is going to beat cancer “insensitive” and “offensive”? Are you, or loved ones in your family, cancer? If so, I’m sorry the star of Roadhouse and Dirty Dancing is going to hunt down you/your family like Whitney Houston hunting down that last stray crack rock between her couch cushions, but that’s just nature. Cancer pushed too hard, just too hard…

  • 9. James replies at 6th March 2008, 9:57 am :

    Is this another one of these things where life imitates art? If you remember or watch M*A*S*H at all, Patrick Swayze was diagnosed with Leukemia.

    I do wish him the best and hope he pulls through!

  • 10. Phil replies at 6th March 2008, 10:09 am :

    Doug, that was hilarious. This isn’t insensitive or offensive in any way. Cancer is an enemy of all mankind, and the only way to fight it is to think this way. It will die. We will kill it. It has no chance.

  • 11. Michael replies at 6th March 2008, 11:29 am :

    If doctors pursued cancer with that level of passion, we’d all be reading about it in history books.

  • 12. Xanther replies at 6th March 2008, 7:57 pm :

    OMFG, that was the best ever. Simply, Gold. I’ve always been a fan of this blog. But this is the midas touch. Good work guys and girl. This show is the Bomb. Cancer is going down. It’s going to fall faster than a shit from heaven.

  • 13. Julius replies at 7th March 2008, 2:01 am :

    Hahahaha hilarious!! Doug your profanity is priceless and surely the crying laughter of John and miss X is golden!!
    MORE WE WANT MORE of that;) A new kinda Chuck Norris thing… Cause Swayze’s bad ass!! He’ll surely kick it’s ass!!

  • 14. The Darbe replies at 7th March 2008, 3:38 pm :


    This rivals Doug’s previous rants on people who talk in movie theaters.

  • 15. JamieM replies at 7th March 2008, 4:22 pm :

    awesome! we need a collage of all of these!

  • 16. Pierry replies at 7th March 2008, 4:56 pm :

    That was EPIC!
    Thanks for the laughs :)

  • 17. Cheryl replies at 7th March 2008, 7:52 pm :

    That was awesome. We all need humor when life throws you some curves!!

  • 18. Bryan replies at 7th March 2008, 7:56 pm :

    That was awesome… Doug is hiliarous. I haven’t laughed that hard since listening to Bubba the Love Sponge this afternoon

Leave a comment

XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <strong>